My India Trip
MY INDIA
TRIP
By Thelma Calimbas Madhok
February 12 to
March 12, 2025
This essay is being written as a tribute to the culture of the man (Pawan Madhok) I got married to fifty years ago (August 2, 1974). This will also serve as a written inheritance to my children Avni and Rishi and to their children for them to have knowledge of their heritage. This trip was also accomplished because of our age I may not be able to survive the grueling international trip again, hence, it might be my last trip to India. Shhh… Next project is a journey to the Philippines.
Pawan’s family hailed from Gujaranwala (now in Pakistan) but was forced to migrate to now India because of the yearning of Moslems and Hindus to separate. His father’s family of 4 brothers and sister left behind vast agricultural lands (Grandpa Bhagwandas was a landlord), buildings (main house plus 3 houses around it), jewelries (Shakuntala/Bari Mummy tried to hide them during the escape by wearing them around her 2 arms), roomful of sarees and other material wealth to escape the wrath of the Moslem rebels. Pawan was just 9 months old then. His father (Man Mohan Madhok/Bara Papa settled his family in Jabalpur and opened a pharmacy store (although he was a lawyer by trade).
THE MADHOK DYNASTY
A painting above is of Diwan Chand, where the Pawan Madhok dynasty can be traced. His father, Rai Mool Singh Madhok, was a wealthy Jagirdar* who was responsible for the tax collection of his village’s agricultural lands. He did not have a son/heir so he requested one (Bhagdwan Das) of the sons of his father’s cousin. Unfortunately, Diwan died in his 30’s, BhagdwanMool Singh had an illegitimate son (Ramdas) from his concubine but he swindled all his inheritance (3/4; ¼ to Bhagdwan Das) to wine and women while Bhagdwan Das worked hard and grew his inheritance. This is the start of Pawan’s family’s wealth.
*A jagirdar was a feudal lord or landlord in historical India, particularly during the Mughal Empire. They were granted land by the emperor in exchange for various services, such as collecting taxes or military service, and were responsible for administering their assigned territory.
Our itinerary started in Minneapolis with stopover in Chicago and London and finally to Delhi. Our domestic travels involved going to north India Delhi, Chandigarh and Kolkata, then to south India Mumbai, Kochi/Munnar, Coimbatore/Goa).
Itinerary 1 or was a train ride from Delhi to Chandigarh then back;
Itinerary 2 was a flight from Delhi to Kolkata;
Itinerary 3 was a flight from Kolkata to Mumbai;
Itinerary 4 was a flight from Mumbai to Kochi (Kerala) then a drive to Munnar mountains;
Itinerary 5, from Munnar driving to Coimbatore (Tamil Nadu), then flying to Goa;
Itinerary 6, from Goa finally flying back to Delhi.
From Delhi returning to Minneapolis on the same route that we flew in.
So far, our travels within India include visits to Pawan’s ancestral city of Jabalpur (Madya Pradesh), Goa (honeymoon at the Portuguese ancestral house of Almira Correia our dear friend), Pachmarhi Biosphere Reserve (supposed to be inhabited by bears, tigers, Indian leopard to name a few), Khajurao group of monuments known for their erotic sculptures, the Golden Triangle (Agra with the Taj Mahal monument, Jaipur and Delhi), Northeast territories where I was mistaken for a chinky-eyed local (Guwahati, Shillong, Kaziranga and the memorable elephant ride at 5am), Kolkata, Dharamsala (home of Dalai Lama), the destination wedding of Ruchi, daughter of Pawan’s niece Seema at Jaipur, the pink city, and Mumbai.
It was 7 years when I last visited India. It was Ruchi’s destination wedding in Jaipur. Since then Pawan has taken 2 to 3 trips to India alone. I could not handle the hassle and bustle of a long international journey. Also, I was recovering from my total knee replacement surgery. I, therefore, missed Seema’s other daughter Saloni’s marriage to Elmer Guardado, and Pawan’s other niece Mini’s 2 daughters’ weddings, i.e. Divya’s to Siddarth Sethi, and Megha’s to Rahul Sachdeva. To the rescue – Pawan’s idea is to spare our bodies to such agony by traveling business class. We took the offer from kayak/Arangrant travel agency which gave us 50% discount on fares!! I thank British Air and my wonderful air hostesses for such a wonderful experience. It will be hard for me to go back traveling “Economy” on international flights.
BACHI BHRAJI/UNCLE
Main goal of this trip was to meet, maybe one more time Pawan’s old relatives who are in their 90’s. In particular, Pawan wanted to see his beloved Bachi Bhraji, Veena’s husband who has been suffering from Parkinson disease for the last 5 years or more. It was diagnosed but the tremors have been observed for a long time. The disease is now at the advanced stage with him not having any body strength at all (no standing, extremities immobile, speech not communicative), difficulty breathing. A 24-hr caregiver is presently attending to his physical needs. However, his mind is as sharp as a kitchen knife. Dare not talk about him in his presence. It was pathetic to see him in such condition from a robust, brave, CEO of Chambar Fertilizers for years. He would ask me in his gargling way “How are you today, Thelma?”. He commissioned Vipin the driver to take him to the fruit market to buy me fruits and came home with African mangoes, chikkus, big sweet guavas, santra oranges, native bananas (the so-called princess). He also told the driver to get Indian sweets like barfi, kalakand, gulab jamun, rasgulas, chum chum and anything I desire from Haldiram Sweets, the best sweet store in India. Oh, I’ll miss him a lot!! And they pampered me so much in India.
ARRIVAL
Our itinerary included stopovers in Chicago then to London and ended at Delhi. We arrived at around 1am of February 13, 2025. My big question is: why international flights come and go from Delhi during odd hours. I was told that European association of controllers decided no flights their way during the night because controllers are not willing to work during those hours. They want their “beauty rest”uninterrupted.
Vipin met us at the airport, zigzagged through Delhi streets and finally arrived home at around 3 am where Veena and Megha met us then off to sleep. This extra overtime shift earned Vipin 50 rupees per hour otherwise he works from 10 am to 7 pm 6 days a week. Another driver Rajender works same number of hours, with extra shift distributed between Vipin and him.
DELHI DAY 1 FEBRUARY 13, 2025
Breakfast at 8, lunch at 1pm, tea at 5-6pm, dinner at 8. Bachi Uncle then goes to bed at 10pm. This is the meal schedule at Veena Buwa’s house. No obligation to follow but they want to gather during meal time to talk about the day’s events.
The old room downstairs where Pawan’s parents Bari Mummy and Bara Papa stayed, were renovated, expanded, put more fixtures to accommodate Bachi Uncle who cannot go climb the winding stairs to second floor. They put us up in their master bedroom. HUGE! I get scared being there alone; 2 receiving rooms, prayer small corner for Nanak’s portrait Sikhism’s religious founder (Bachi Uncle being a Sikh before and still a follower of Nanak). A big bathroom, dressing room, Bachi Uncle’s corner office.
DAY 2 FEBRUARY 14, 2025
Shopping begins!! I also did not realize it’s Valentine’s Day. Mini, Veena’s second daughter, took us to Kilol, a Women’s ready made dress shop where I bought 3 cotton kurtis for Delhi’s cool days. Then to Fabindia, a famous store for almost anything. I bought Rishi, a Nehru jacket, accompanying white shirt, Nicholas white shirt. Unfortunately, these acquisitions went missing after I showed to a local tailor to check the measurements for Rishi and Pawan’s Nehru silk suits. They would not admit that the jackets were left behind in their store accidentally by me. Oh, well!! “Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?” Not me, then who??” (Note: the package was found buried under some clothes in the closet 04252025; with apologies to Mohit Gupta, the tailor/owner).
DAY 4 FEBRUARY 16, 2025 AN OUTING AT DELHI TAJ MAHAL HOUSE OF MING – BACHI UNCLE’S FAVORITE RESTAURANT
This is Bachi Uncle. He always wants to be in control. If he wants something nobody can says NO. So off we went to House of Ming at the 5-star Taj Mahal. The best Chinese restaurant in New Delhi HOUSE OF MING. phone-icon +91 14135 03670. Crispy chicken, prawn curry, butterscotch/strawberry ice cream to name a few of our favorite. Yummy!!
DAY 5 FEBRUARY 18, 2025
An afternoon visit from Anil Gujral and Vipin Gujral, Pawan’s first cousins from Kushalya’s family, Bari Mummy’s sister. Photos show a get-together at the Maharani Bagh lawn surrounded by beautiful winter/spring flowers tended by the gardener (mali, Hindi for gardener) of 30 years.
Left to right: Anil, Me, Bipin, Veena Behnji, Pawan.
DAY 6 FEBRUARY 19, 2025 MEETING WITH THE MAHARANI BAGH STAFF/COOKING LESSON WITH CHOTELAL
Meet the Maharani Bagh staff (50%; additional staff includes 2 guards, so-called butler Ambatat, 2nd driver, 2nd cook, cleaner): Nareesh, Bachi Uncle’s caregiver, Vipin, the driver, Sonya, the second housekeeper, Chotelal, the cook. Why is my chicken curry not as good-looking as yours (bright red!!), I’ve asked him. His suggestion: saute longer and add dried red chili. Gave suggestions on how to cook eggplant bharta, dhal channa, etc. Between somebody not talking in English and somebody not talking in Hindi, we understood each other at the end. We were pampered by the staff from having morning tea, breakfast, afternoon tea, and dinner not to forget waiting for us to get up from bed so they can make the bed, washed clothes we wore after a bath, cooked any meal we desired, cleaned/swept our bedroom every day, drove us to wherever we wanted to go, and of course tended to the lawn for us to admire the dahlias, marigolds, petunias, calamansi plant native to Philippines.
Top: Nareesh, Bachi Uncle’s caregiver; Vipin, driver; Sonya, housekeeper; Chotelal, cook; Mali, gardener. Bottom: spinach garbanzos; chicken curry
DAY 7 FEBRUARY 20 OUTING AT A SOUTH INDIAN (SAGAR RATNA) RESTAURANT IN CHANAKYAPURI DELHI Another of Bachi Uncle’s favorite) https://sagarratna.in/. Pawan went wild with his appam, rice-based crepe like dosa which is rice/dhal based crepe.
DAY 8-9, FEBRUARY 21-22, 2025 OFF TO CHANDIGARH, NORTH OF DELHI, AND BACK
21 Feb 2025: Delhi to Chandigarh Train (Klk Shatabadi-12011)/ Dep from Delhi-07:40 AM/ Arrive at Chandigarh-10:59 AM (Class Executive Chair Car)
Fare: INR 3,600/- For 02 Persons Including agent service charge
22 Feb 2025: Chandigarh to Delhi Train (NDLS Shatabadi-12046)/ Dep from Chandigarh-12:05 PM/ Arrive at Delhi-03:20 PM (Class Executive Chair Car)
Fare: INR 3,600/- For 02 Persons Including agent service charge
Goal of this trip: To meet Usha Behnji, 91 yrs old, Pawan’s sister from Bara Papa’s third brother KG KRISHNAN GOPAL MADHOK, the Chandigarh branch. Latika Bakshi of NJ and Dr. Dinesh Madhok of FL are part of this family.
Chandigarh is a city and union territory in northern India, serving as the shared capital of the states of Punjab and Haryana. Situated near the foothills of the Shivalik range of Himalayas, it borders Haryana to the east and Punjab in the remaining directions. Chandigarh constitutes the bulk of the Chandigarh Capital Region or Greater Chandigarh, which also includes the adjacent satellite cities of Panchkula in Haryana and Mohali in Punjab. It is located 260 km (162 miles) northwest of New Delhi and 229 km (143 miles) southeast of Amritsar and 104 km (64 miles) southwest of Shimla.
The train ride was 3 hrs long taking only 5 min every stops. They served breakfast on the way to Chandigarh and lunch on the way back to Delhi. Check out their menu!! We were also fortunate to have shared a dining table with another couple, she has a PhD in Biochemistry (Got excited about my degree) and the Head of the Department at the Punjab University. While the husband was a retired editor of the TRIBUNE. They were coming back from a trip to celebrate Maha Kumbh Mela at the Ganges in Varanasi. Significance: The festival's timing celebrated every 144 years, is correlated with the partial or full revolution of Jupiter, making it a significant event in the Hindu religious calendar.
Our new found friend (sorry to have missed their names) in the train, very highly professional Indians but still follow traditions .
We had a good visit with Usha Behnji who prepared a sumptuous Indian meal. Chandigarh is very environmentally conscious, green everywhere, has adopted a solar panel heating system so no heater in the house but with A/C in place. Imagine being up north with the house sooo cold, in the 50’s in the am. Her family includes Manu, the son, Nithi, the wife and Satvik, the talented and very talkative 10 year old son who is so technical in nature. As a parting memento, Usha Behnji gave me 10,000 rupees ($115) for being a first time visitor in her house. Very grateful!!
DAY 10, FEBRUARY 23, 2025 OFF TO KOLKATA
23 Feb 2025: Delhi to Kolkata- Indigo (6E 587) / Dep from Delhi-10:30 AM/ Arrive at Kolkata-12:35 PM
Fare: INR 12,906/- For 02 Persons
Kolkata,[a] also known as Calcutta[b] (its official name until 2001), is the capital and largest city of the Indian state of West Bengal. It lies on the eastern bank of the Hooghly River, 80 km (50 mi) west of the border with Bangladesh. It is the primary financial and commercial centre of eastern and northeastern India.[15] Kolkata is the seventh most populous city in India with an estimated city proper population of 4.5 million (0.45 crore) while its metropolitan region Kolkata Metropolitan Area is third most populous metropolitan region of India with a metro population of over 15 million (1.5 crore).[16] Kolkata is regarded by many sources as the cultural capital of India and a historically and culturally significant city in the historic region of Bengal.
VILAS BHANDARI BABI was so nice to host us in her house for 3 days. She is the widow of Pawan’s first cousin NITYA KUMAR BHANDARI who died at 47 yrs from a heart attack. He was the only son of Kartara Devi Bhandari (or Buwaji), only sister of Bara Papa. Very young widow indeed but was able to care for her 3 daughters, Rohini, Shalini, and Malini who grew up strong and successful in what they have chosen to be (married to rich Indians; Malini is a proprietor of a bakery shop in Kolkata).
She even gathered The Madhoks of Kolkata for a pot luck afternoon tea. Attendees include: Shuvh Babi (mother of Kumud, Bindu, and Poonam, Umang. Whenever I meet her she gives me a gift which this time 2000 rupees), Prabha Babi (mother of Anoop, Nisha), Madhu (adopted daughter of Raji and “Christopher Lee”or Anand Kumar or Nandi Madhok) and Surinder Manocha, Malini (Vilas’ daughter). Very grateful to Madhu and Surinder for giving us a tour of St. Paul Cathedral and Victoria Park and a lunch at the Kolkata Club. Very adventurous couple! At the moment they are touring north of India by car with Dharamsala as the final destination. Surinder’s hobby is photography (see the Mad*hoc Adda at WhatsApp to view his collections).
Top: Pot luck afternoon tea at Vilas Babi’s house.
Middle: St. Patrick Cathedral; fruit vendor.
Bottom: Victoria Park in honor of Queen Victoria; Malai chum chum, the best Bengali sweet.
DAY 14 FEBRUARY 26, 2025 OFF TO MUMBAI
26 Feb 2025: Kolkata to Mumbai- Indigo (6E 5297) / Dep from Kolkata-09:30 AM/ Arrive at Mumbai-12:30 PM
Fare: INR 12,798/- For 02 Persons
Mumbai (formerly called Bombay) is a densely populated city on India’s west coast. A financial center, it's India's largest city. On the Mumbai Harbour waterfront stands the iconic Gateway of India stone arch, built by the British Raj in 1924. Offshore, nearby Elephanta Island holds ancient cave temples dedicated to the Hindu god Shiva. The city's also famous as the heart of the Bollywood film industry.
We were hosted by Tito (Atul) Talwar, Pawan’s first cousin from Bari Mummy’s side (sister Pushpa Auntie) for 2 days in his condominium in the Andheri West suburban northwest side of Mumbai. Nice view of the skyline of Mumbai from the bedroom. We had lunch at Cream Centre | Fun Republic Mall | Andheri West. What a big channa batura we had!! Sizzling brownie was out of this world!! Manju, sister of Karan Madhok, aunt of Kunal Madhok, prepared dinner for all Madhoks nearby (including Meera’s daughter; Meera (another of Karan’s sister) died of ovarian cancer.
Next day we moved to Harbour View Hotel next to the harbour at the southside of Mumbai. I was told this area is where the real Mumbai’s life is, e.g. Taj Mahal (a 5-star hotel destroyed by Pakistani terrorist), India Gate, tons of shopping stores both high-end and low-end markets. Below are photos of our $100 a night hotel overlooking the Mumbai harbor while watching the sunset.
The last relative we visited was Toy Behnji, being cared of by son Vivek Kharbanda. She is 97 years old but in high spirit and remembered me very well. I last visited her in another condominium overlooking the Ambani’s palace.
DAY 18 MARCH 2, 2025 OFF TO KOCHI/MUNNAR
02 Mar 2025 (Mumbai to Kochi- Indigo (6E 6701) / Dep from Mumbai-10:40 AM/ Arrive at Kochi-12:40 PM
Fare: INR 14,282/- For 02 Persons
Now it was the start of a dream R&R for me (so I thought). No more relatives to meet just Pawan and I staying in a 5-star retreat house (Eden Woods Retreat and SPA) overlooking mountains, sightseeing in south India (Kerala) and sampling their south Indian cuisine which are very different from Punjabi food.
Our driver Mr. Vishak Mob:095441 22425 Etios-KL-44-J-0860 picked us up at Kochi airport and drove us to Munnar, a 3.5 hr trip through winding roads. First stop was in Kalady-thalayattumpilli, Kerala.
Adi Shankara Sthoopam Temple
Kalady is a beautiful village with rustic simplicity and serenity, situated at the banks of the Periyer River. Kalady holds immense historical and cultural significance as the birthplace of Adi Shankaracharya Shankara, who was born here in 788 AD. He started preaching at the age of 3, died at 32 yrs (820 AD), is renowned for his contributions to Advaita Vedanta, a school of Hindu philosophy that emphasizes the non-dual nature of the self and the ultimate reality (Brahman). He played a significant role in systematising the Vedanta philosophy, one of the primary schools of Hindu thoughts and helped to revive Hinduism after the Islamic invasions.
We arrived at our retreat cottage in Eden Woods Retreat and SPA in Idukki – Devikulam in Munnar.
Munnar is part of the Idukki district in Kerala. The Munnar region is situated at an altitude of 1500 – 2500 m above sea level where the average rainfall is 275 cm. It is situated at the confluence of three mountain streams – Muddrapuzha, Nallanthanni, and Kundala, surrounded by tea plantations, picture book towns and winding lanes. An exotic flora found in the forests and grasslands is the NEELAKURINJI, which bathes the hills in blue every twelve years.
We visited MADUPETTY DAM, ECHO POINT(see poses made by 2 old geezers), ROSE GARDEN, going through the winding roads of Munnar, TEA MUSEUM where we learned the history of tea plantation, manufacture of harvested tea for public consumption, GOVT BOTANICAL GARDEN, SAFARI JEEP RIDE TO PANNI RIVER, first HANGING BRIDGE built by the British, PONMUDI DAM, watched SUNSET over a cup of tea on top of a Munnar mountain range, the NADUKKANI VIEW POINT. On the road, we stumbled on a 5 ft-snake trying to cross the road. Lots of rhesus monkeys were shown congregating on the road. Drivers were very careful not to run over any wildlife.
Left: Madupetty Dam; middle/right: Rose Garden
ECHO POINT: One can shout across the river and your echo can be heard. Can you recognize our famous “Titanic” pose? A photographer took poses for 25 rupees ($0.29) each photo.
SAFARI RIDE TO TOP OF MUNNAR MOUNTAIN
Left: Panni River look out. Middle: first hanging bridge built by the British, Right: watching sunset on NADUKKANI VIEW POINT in Munnar mountains.
DAY 21 MARCH 5, 2025 MUNNAR/COIMBATORE AIRPORT TO GOA
05 Mar 2025: Coimbatore to Goa- Indigo (6E 7004) / Dep from Coimbatore-04:45 PM/ Arrive at Goa-06:35 PM
Fare: INR 7,180/- For 02 Persons
Next day March 5, 2025, we drove to Coimbatore airport to catch the flight to Goa. The shorter route chosen by our driver was closed due to construction so it took us 2 or so hours to reach Coimbatore airport using an alternative route. Thank goodness, it was 15 min to boarding!! Another surprise – our Indigo plane was an ATR 72-600 with 6-blades propellers aside from engines. Made it all right!! Below is a photo of the Indigo ATR jet while on air. Quite a quiet ride. Did not go up high probably only 16,000 ft. It took us 1.5 hrs to reach Goa.
Goa is a state in western India with coastlines stretching along the Arabian Sea. Its long history as a Portuguese colony prior to 1961 is evident in its preserved 17th-century churches and the area’s tropical spice plantations. Goa is also known for its beaches, ranging from popular stretches at Baga and Palolem to those in laid-back fishing villages such as Agonda.
Goa was the last city in India that we visited. We were to meet with Pawan’s brother Raman and niece Meenakshi Bawa (Mini). Raman and family (Geeta, Nikhil and Anuj) were in Denmark for 15 years or so. Then decided to move back to India and accepted a position at Agro Chemicals in Goa as its President. It was also a sad moment in the family to lose Nikhil from a teenage driver under the influence of alcohol in Copenhagen.
Top: Mini’s apartment, Below: Raman’s house. Geeta was bedridden here due to a car accident recently.
On March 8, 2025 we flew back to Delhi to relax and prepare for a long trip back to Minnesota. However, I developed salmonella food poisoning probably due to chicken teriyaki sandwich I ate at the Goa airport Subway’s restaurant. The 4 days we spent in Delhi was mostly on bed eating toast and tea only because of vomiting, nauseous episodes. I survived the flights back home again through British Air with layovers in London and Chicago.
EPILOGUE
I feel fulfilled to be able to complete this tour of India book. Before my marriage to an Indian national, I (we, outsiders) thought of India as a very primitive place with locals and aborigines as inhabitants. It opened my eyes to other cultures in the world. In 200,000 years ago, we started as belonging to one big continent (Africa), then migration to the west produced aberrations with people of lighter skin and hair, physique, and intelligence. The variation in skin color between South and North Indians is primarily due to geographic and genetic factors, with darker skin tones in the south linked to higher UV radiation levels and specific gene variants. North Indians tend to have lighter skin due to fewer UV indices and a higher prevalence of a particular gene related to lighter skin tones.
North Indians (Pawan’s heritage) have a higher percentage of Indo-Aryan ancestry (Caucasian, Middle Easterners, SE Asians), which is associated with lighter skin tones, while South Indians have a higher percentage of Dravidian (African) ancestry, which is associated with darker skin tones.
Before I left the Philippines, we only knew of the big bulky “Bombay-looking Indians” wearing turbans and carrying big black umbrellas and peddling their merchandise along the streets of Manila. Not true, actually. These are Afghanis not Indians. Getting out of one’s comfort zone opens our eyes from the world other than what we are born to know.
THE FUTURE
I plan to create an ancestry tree showing Pawan’s father and mother sides of family. It is of importance for the future generations to learn of their genetic map which might explain their behavior, thus help them navigate their future. I was asked by Raina, Avni’s 8-year old daughter, why she is considered an Indian but could not see the “Indian (blood) on her”.
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